Why is it that sometimes the prettiest things in life come with the hardest work? Newborn baby. Clean house. Beautiful wedding Three year old that says "Thank you". Homemade chocolate chip cookies. Is there anything prettier? ...Actually, when I think of my Nana laying beside my Granddaddy as he was passing away, that was beauty.
Six years ago yesterday Andrew proposed to me on Mt. Rainier. Following that engagement has come six years of "work". Communicating when one or both of us would rather zone out on our phone. Cooking the Mexican casserole with the mild Rotel to appease his intolerance for anything spicy. Sad day. Going to Dirt Cheap or some other bargain store with him. (I mysteriously always end up buying more than him.) Is it always easy to respect him, sacrifice for him, like him? Nope. But when I see him cleaning up dinner or playing outside with our girls.... worth it. When he hugs me and knows how I feel without me having to speak... worth it. To have him by side through this journey of life until one of us passes away... totally 100% worth it.
Getting Adelyn to fall asleep at night is painfully hard. I'd rather teach a monkey calculus most days. We are discovering that her love language is quality time. That's a hard one for me. Go figure that God would give me a child like this. Addie's Heaven right now looks something like me and Andrew playing Ring around the Rosie with her beanie babies for HOURS with her. I love my child, but I would rather do a puzzle with her or teach her phonics or read her a story or pick lice out of her hair (ok, I exaggerate... Please God, pretend like I never said that). We find that the more effort we put into truly BEING with her throughout the day, the more likely she is to cooperate and go to sleep. Sticking to the routine, giving her limited choices in the process, and keeping the lights dim an hour before bed also helps... And oh by the way, never have I ever despised the sun going down at 8:45 as much as I do now. Some nights after we've played with "the kids" (Dobie, Twigs, Moosie, and the gang), read 2 or 20 books, let her "read" the books again, sang every soothing song we know, scratched her back in the most sedating way possible, and prayed about every family member then we have to do the inevitable and turn out all lights and begrudgingly lock her door... from the outside. Because goodness knows a child safety lock was no match for her. Her cries are heartbreaking but she eventually gives up and passes out. I question every parenting choice I made during bed time that night and why it was so hard and how it could get better. I just pray that one day all of this hard work will produce a beautiful product of our baby girl falling asleep in oh, let's say 1 hour instead of 2 or 3.
Whether its nurturing a marriage or raising a child (or making cookies), if something is worthwhile then the work we pour into it is worthy our time.
God consistently pours Himself into us.
Putting a toddler to bed pales in comparison to how long it takes us to learn how to submit to Him. Yet He patiently reads us stories, scratches our backs, sings to us, and reads us the stories again. Painfully he turns out the lights and locks our doors sometimes too. Thank you Lord for believing that we are worthy of your time and transforming us into beautiful flowers... even if we produce the messiest leaves.
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